Monday, January 18, 2010

I wonder....

if till the Spring of 2012 I will FREAK OUT at the beginning of every semester? Over the last week, I have once again had a roller coaster of emotions: excited, nervous, tearful, happy, sad, full out crazy. I have been alternating from getting ready to just laying around like it will all happen by itself ;-) I must say I did a little TOO much feeling sorry for myself over the last week. Over and over again, I was asking myself these burning questions:



  • How am I going to make it work? my kids, Dax time, class schedule, 4 kids schedules, laundry, dinner,........ all the UNKNOWNS
  • What do I do when the kids get sick? Am I going to take a puking kid to the Dr. just to have an excuse or will Dax take off work or maybe Leah will watch them (THEY AREN'T EVEN SICK SOOOOO WHY AM I PLANNING THIS IN MY HEAD)


  • Am I missing out on time with the kids being in school myself? Are they only going to remember me studying all the time?


  • Can I do this? Am I REALLY doing this? Why again AM I doing this...NOW?


  • Over $500 in books.....BOOKS....I am talking about 4 books.... WHY?


  • Am I going to FINISH anything....EVER?


  • Why do I worry so much?


Ok, so I really already know the answer to these questions.

I know why I have chosen to go back to school.

I am loving school!

I know that I am fortunate that what I am loving will also make me a better parent.

The time I spend with the kids is all about quality. They know I love them.

I know that I have a wonderful supportive husband and 4 cool kids pitching to help me!!!

And well, I worry because............... I don't know but I thought just typing it out would help me feel better. My Spring classes start Tuesday....wish me (us all) luck and say a little prayer if you are so inclined!!!!

4 comments:

Dax said...

You got this! No sweat. I believe in you.

Poppy said...

Worrying is synonymous with being a Mom. It's part of the package.

I think you're amazing to be tackling all of this! I know what it's like to mother 4 children, manage your household and be a wife. I can't imagine adding student to the mix!

I'm sure with such a supportive husband and kids you'll do just fine.

Deep breath. You can do it!

Beth said...

Thanks for listening to me and helping encourage me! Not only do I have my supportive family but also friends like you Poppy....THANK YOU!
Taking some deep breaths and relaxing my face & shoulders.

Angela Draper said...

I really do think you are amazing for going back to school. It sounds like you do have a wonderfully supportive family and you will do great! Best to you!